MOLDY CHUM

Cubicle Fishing

Do you know why they call it "fishing"???

Because "F*CK" was already taken.

The Nemesing One takes one for the team.

Fishing. I loath fishing, but my kids love it. So I go. I've logged more hours fishing in this summer than the rest of my life combined. I hate it. First you buy all the stuff, poles, reels, lines, hooks, spinners, sinkers, bobbers, a knife, needle-nose pliers, a chain to hold all your fish, and a tackle box to put it all in. Boom, I'm out $100 and that's at Walmart for 3rd-rate sh*t.

Via: I'm Sure I Don't Know LINK

Hot Fishing Action

Unfortunate Ad Placement

Via: Say No to Crack

Chumugly

As an adjective:

Alcohol couldn't take it away, she/he was four-beer chumugly

Penelope Cruz is not Chumugly

As a synonym: Chihuly and his glass art might be described as....

Via: Wadin' Boot @ Washington Fly Fishing  LINK

Catching Trout Has Never Been So Easy

                                    Click to ENLARGE

Via: Troutball

The Solution to Fishile Dysfunction

Coming to a theater near you

Let's check Google News and see what people are hooked on

You
Fishing
Nintendo Wii
Meth
Tales of characters inspired by ancient Indian mythology
Clothes
Age-Defying Israeli skincare product (Madonna)
Ballooning
Drugs
Meme-ing
Social networking
Sci Fi's Syndicated Star Trek
Transformers
Musky Fest
Newest state park
Heroin
Blogging
Horses
Ice cappuccinos
Cash
Tennis
Botox
Banjo fishing lure
Solitude in cars
Cycling
Science
Bee keeping
Soccer
Facebook

Nobody appears to be hooked on phonics.  Via J-Walk Blog

If You Like Salmon Coladas....

#7 on the list of the 10 worst drink concepts of all time.

3 ounces light rum
2 cups crushed ice
3 tablespoons pineapple juice
3 tablespoons coconut milk
1 ounce fresh Atlantic salmon
Salmon head (for garnish)

Blend all ingredients and garnish with a salmon head.

If anyone at the party starts talking about the importance of omega-3 fatty acids, merely gesture at your drink and say, “Eh? Eh? That enough for ya? Later in the evening, give your salmon head a name and have it deliver monologues on the commercialization of independent cinema or why the French Laundry is past its prime.  VIA Chow  LINK

Shiny, Wriggling Object Attracting Interest Among Fish Community

The appearance of a shiny, bobbling object in the water of the Brule, just upstream of the big sunken oak stump, is generating considerable interest among members of the fish community, river sources reported Monday.

Via: The Onion LINK

“Do these waders make my butt look big?”

If women planned fishing trips.  Via Davezilla  LINK

Defiant Trout Refuses Federal Protection

Doyle Redland reporting.  LINK

Ask A Salmon!

Via: The Onion  LINK

The Infamous Pike Place Monkfish

Some local Chum flavor from Seattle's Pike Place Market. Via: The Seattle PI LINK

Sex Toy or Fishing Lure?

  Test your knowledge! LINK

Fishing for Fellatio

Dear Bass Pro Shops:

I received your latest letter with great enthusiasm. Lord knows how I ever got on your mailing list, but I'm so glad I did. I get your catalogs once or twice a month, mixed in with a letter here and there. Now you're offering me a Bass Pro Shops credit card. This really makes me wonder about your research department.

Via: Secondhand Tryptophan LINK

Lake fish killed by amorous toads

In one incident around 70 carp, worth about £3,000, were lost after male toads tried to mate with them on the Wykeham Estate. Via: Scarborough Today News  LINK

Bull? Shit!

Finding Sushi

VIA: Mental Floss  LINK

LINK

Research Grant Blown Wooing Cute Research Assistant

"I thought that grant would last Jim [Neuthom] at least two years, but I simply didn't realize how many hot-air balloon rides, CDs, and spontaneous dinners at tiny French restaurants are required for an in-depth trout study," said UM professor of agriculture Steven Czymedia, who claimed he was "fascinated" by Neuthom's new theory that fine champagne might be directly related to rainbow trout migratory routes.  VIA The Onion LINK

Fishing in the Alternate Universe

Timmy had a great day of fishing at Three Mile Island

Chum Toonage!

VIA Gone Fishing  LINK

Fish Arse

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The Bear Necessities

A Salmon Guide to Catch That Fly Fishing Hottie

Ladies, it's spawning season again - for our andromous friends. Yes, the salmon and steelhead have eaten all summer, I know, I know, while we've all been starving ourselves to paint on bikinis, to make their final labors of love on inland rivers. It's constant sex, pregnancy, then death - doesn't it just feel that way for all of us?  VIA Happy Woman Magazine LINK

Blazing Bellyboats and Other Outdoor MIS-Adventures

In a style reminiscent of humorist Patrick F. McManus, Cliff Ruminer endures the life of “The world’s second-unluckiest angler.” From the title story to classics like “Never Trust a Naked Angler,” the reader will howl with laughter at Cliff’s plight, as he ducks and dodges his way through the fallout of his aborted attempts to enjoy his favorite outdoor pastime. VIA Amazon LINK

Other books by this author? There's a Naked Fisherman in my Tutu.

My Name is Pat and I am a Fishaholic

I think I have always had a fishing problem. Fishing is a disease. The more you fish the more you have to fish until the only way you can fish as much as you have to is to be a millionaire or a fishing guide. I am a fishing guide.

Pat is also a writer, poet, landscape artist and fish psychologist.  LINK

Pro Bass Fisherman Explains Life To Son Through Complicated Bass-Fishing Metaphors

In his efforts to teach his son important life lessons, tournament bass fisherman Kyle Traverts usually reverts to complex bass-fishing metaphors, sources close to the family reported Tuesday.  VIA The Onion  LINK

Fisherman's 4-Year-Old Son Liberates Bait

Doyle Redland reporting.  LINK

Catch and release' border policy ends

Anglers now allowed to retain one Mexican over 18 inches.  LINK

The Singing Dumb Ass Bass

VIA My Fishy Site  LINK
 

Horton's Hats

Just one more to go!

Whippersnapper Gas Powered Tarpon Fly

You know the drill!

More Wayne McLoughlin goodness.

The Waders with the Lead Boots

Click to ENLARGE!

Part three of our series of Wayne McLoughlin posts.

Kahonee's Bros. Air Service

Click to ENLARGE!

The second in our vacation series of posts featuring the art of Wayne McLoughlin.

Fishing Humor from Wayne McLoughlin

Click to ENLARGE!

The first in a series of posts featuring the art of Wayne McLoughlin.

Poachers Steal Lake

Did you hear the one about the two Polish fisherman who stole a lake?  LINK

Stream State University

Affixed to the diploma is an embossed gold foil seal of "Graduate". Each diploma can be personally customized for you with a name and graduation date of your choosing.  LINK

Reel Bad Holiday Gift Guide

Don't you wish sometimes when you're sitting on the john that you were sailing the seas, casting a line for a 10 foot swordfish, smelling the salty air of the sea, maybe taking down a couple of cold ones??  LINK

Don't you wish sometimes when you're on the couch, flipping through the channels, that you were flipping a surface plug for Billy Bass??  LINK

Don't you wish sometimes when you're on the practice green that golf was as easy as fishing with bait?  LINK

The Joys of Ice Fishing

Download ice_fishing.mpeg

Quotes from the World of Fishing

Today she met me at the door, said I would have to choose, if I picked that fishing pole today, she'd be packing all her things and she'd be gone by noon....well I'm gonna miss her when I get home tonight. Right now I'm on this lake shore, and I'm sitting in the sun! I'm sure it'll hit me when I walk thru that door tonight. Yeah, I'm gonna miss her. Oh lookie there, I gotta bite!" - Brad Paisley

LINK

"Bass fishermen watch Monday night football, drink beer, drive pickup trucks and prefer noisy women with big breasts.
Trout fishermen watch MacNeil-Lehrer, drink white wine, drive foreign cars with passenger-side air bags and hardly think about women at all.
This last characteristic may have something to do with the fact that trout fishermen spend most of the time immersed up to the thighs in ice-cold water." - New Yorker Magazine

LINK

 

Turning Fish Into Wine

Anyone for a 1998 Chateau Le Carp?

LINK

Dog Fishing Reel

If you ask us, fishing is a pain in the bass. You need a boat, you need bait, and you need expensive equipment. Oh, and you need more patience than god.  And more often than not, all you have to show for your efforts is a sunburn and a beer belly. This product GUARANTEES a successful fishing outing. In fact, we're sure you'll catch a whopper on your very first cast. All you have to do is fish for your dog.

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